RED flag

Dating. debating to date. to be dating. You first have to debate what form of dating you are going to part take in. We have tinder my heart so hard, okcupid stupid, dish the manyfish, HowAboutWe...don't do this, Meanwhile at the meanwhile, rockys I thought I was dancing cool, meet up and greet up, lez go out or probably not because dot dot dot...

Then once you find someone who matched and attached to your sweet one liners...the "You seem pretty cool, wanna?" "You and I botih like beer, wanna?" "Wanna see where this goes" oh, and here's my number and if we happen to slumber next to each other...I might change your name...instead of something like Emily tinder...you are rewarded with your own God given last name. 

I've been on my fair share of tinder my heart so hard dates. Which leads me to

Red fuckin Flags, those warnings you should see, the flag to signal all the crazies...

Baby, I see you and you cute but you came drunk as skunk dunkin your dinner in your beer...Tearing me apart because what I waste of beer. 

Red Flags, alright...you're gay, right? I'm not your gateway, right? And you are mighty fine slayin it with your knowledge and your looks. When did you come out? oh, last month...wait, how old are you? oooooo shit.

Red Flags,you really downplayed how many cats you have. 2 does not equal 10. 

Red Flags, Why haven't I met your friends? Baby gurl, I'm def not one to be locked up blocked behind close doors. I'm not quiet and I'm no one's secret. Cause then you aren't gonna frequent this shining beacon no more. 

Virtual dating is not the most intellectual stimulating activity. If I want to go on a date with you I'm not going to put out bait for you. I'll deflate that ego and just be straight with you...we ain't soulmates just yet and we aren't playmates this early in the game. So let me translate this for you. Don't formulate a plan to hold back on your crazy. I will find that red flag. Decorate it any way you know how. I will find that red flag like capture the flag. We on that same team? Blue or red.

I hope you aren’t team red because all of those crazies you are bringing out the woodshed show me you aren’t in tip top shape in handling the lost of your exes. Sending them home in an uber Lexus. Cause fact is We all have red flags don't put the cat in the bag and tag it for later cause I'll just see you later miss Red fuxking flag 

Red flag